Yesterday the air cleared enough for me to breathe long enough to get out and do my grocery shopping. As I pushed my cart rapidly through the store, I ventured into the garden center. I love the mums that show up at this time of year to give some added color to the garden. I really don’t need another plant, but still, I couldn’t resist a walk into that space. There were huge containers of mixed autumn colors. Brilliant maroons, lusty browns and glistening golds all in one pot. I took a look at the price tag and quickly walked away. As I left the garden center, I couldn’t help but notice a leafy hydrangea bush with several brown petals, yet a few dazzling white blooms peeking through. The leaves were healthy, the soil moist and the price was right. Ten dollars for this somewhat pitiful looking plant that never made it into a garden. So, I put it in my cart, finished my shopping and went home.

How ridiculous, I thought as I drove home. Only a couple of months ago we were looking for a new place to live. Senior housing was on our minds. The thought of selling our house has since been put on hold. Why on earth would I even think I needed another plant. My garden is filled with lovely perennials. This summer has been a banner year for all of them, but somehow that lonely hydrangea was calling out to me. Now I have to find a spot for it, dig a hole and hope that it survives the winter.

I realize that I didn’t need to buy that plant, even though it was a huge bargain. It was going to require extra work on my part. It was going to require intervention from God to restore it to its original beauty. I felt guilty. I felt foolish. I felt, in a way, that it was something I had to do. Suddenly I realized that I’ve been doing this a lot for the past few years. I’ve been trying to fix things. I’ve been hanging on tightly to something I have no control over. The events going on in our lives right now are like that plant. Love and attention are not always enough. Sometimes we simply have to let go and let God.

Dear, Father, God, I ask that you help me surrender to your will. When difficult times make me wonder what to pray for, help me to know that you are in control of everything and that your plan for us is always good. Please, Lord, increase my faith in you and allow me to surrender. Amen!