During that first year of marriage, there will be so many things to discover about your spouse, even if you’ve known each other for most of your 22 years. You find out it isn’t all about you anymore. I knew before marrying my husband that he loves hunting. I got accustomed to seeing dead birds in the refrigerator with rigor mortis already setting in. He had to tolerate going to bed with a woman with rollers in her hair and sweat socks on her feet. Gone were the days of trying to impress. Now it was a matter of putting up with each other’s reality.

Each of those tiny adjustments were just the beginning of a lifetime filled with them. Compromise is right up there with laughter in importance. You must put aside your own personal needs and take on an attitude of selflessness, but still maintain the same personality that drew you together in the first place. Not always an easy task.

We can never fully mirror the love that Jesus has for us, but we can use His servant attitude as an example. When you’re fully devoted to the one you love, you put them first. The second year is a little better, but by the third you’re introduced to a whole new element – another life which God is knitting together within you. You share crackers in bed first thing in the morning. You compare waist sizes. You cry at the silliest things, while he tolerates your mood swings.

As years pass, you become more and more of one mind, despite some disagreements, but every step brings you closer together and closer to your Creator.

By the time you’ve shared a lifetime together – created a family – built a business – watch it fall and try again – put your faith in the God of heaven and earth – you finally realize you are no longer two individuals, but one connected by that same God.

Anyone that enters marriage without placing the other person before themselves, will probably not be successful. If that same couple chooses to marry anyway and forgets to include the tie that binds – God – there is a lot of pain that will go along with it.
Every marriage will encounter difficulties, pain and tests which can either strengthen your life together or cause it to fail. The point is that there is work involved in the process. Don’t expect any less. Anything worthwhile is worth working hard to preserve.


As I reach the end of my years, I find I have a lot of good information stored up in this old decrepit mind of mine. If I don't write it all down, it may vanish and no one will have the advantage of my thoughts. This is why this blog exists. I love the Lord, Jesus with all my heart and soul. I know I'm undeserving of all He's done for me, but I also know that His love is beyond my comprehension. I've always wanted to write. I never kept diaries, but tucked my thoughts in my head for future reference. I use them now in creating stories, plays, poetry and my blog. I continue to learn every day. I believe the compilation of our time spent with God will have huge affect on the way we live. I know I'm a sinner and I need a Savior. I have One through Jesus, Christ. My book, "Stages - a memoir," is about the seven stages of life from the perspective of a woman. It addresses all the things girls and women go through in life as they travel it with Jesus, and it is available on
This entry was posted in marriage and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.


  1. It’s the hardest job next to parenting— but truly worth every frustration and heart ache!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This is really good Kathy. My husband and I will celebrate 40 years come October. “Gone were the days of trying to impress. Now it was a matter of putting up with each other’s reality.” I grin at that line because it is so very true! I still do like to try amaze my husband though….and sometimes I do but maybe not in the way I had meant to!

    Liked by 1 person

    • says:

      Haha I hear you. Congrats in advance to you and your hubby. I believe that finding the love of your life is no accident. It’s all part of God’s plan for us.


Comments are closed.