ART & POETRY BY PAUL & KATHY BOECHER©

It’s May 1st – another turn of the page on my calendar – a day to celebrate new beginnings, springtime, flowers and love popping up all over. It’s also been 16 months since the day the love of my life entered his heavenly home. As I count off each day, each month, each year, the pain lessens, but it’s never gone. I see him in the paintings he left behind. I find a memorable photograph of our life together and it’s as if he never departed. I wake in the night thinking I heard his voice. For a while, I expected him to walk through the front door and hug me hello. The hugs show up at the most unusual times. A memory – the sound of laughter – the feeling of aloneness. I have joined the ranks of widowhood, but I still feel the bond we had in life. I’m learning how it feels to be a fifth wheel. I’m trying to adapt to the lost conversations, the things he taught me, the shared faith, the encouragement and loss. I’m discovering new things in my own journey as old age creeps up on me and aches and pains become an everyday occurrence. Although I’m surrounded by people who love and care for me, a huge chunk of me died with him. I know we will be together again and that’s the promise that keeps me going.

Butterflies tickle my insides each time I try something new,
I worry and fret and often forget how Jesus knows just what to do,
He’s always around when I need Him, He walks with me all of the way,
He won’t let me down – He helps me find strength to sweep all frustration away,
No matter the day or the hour, I experience His awesome power,
He’s at my side and with me He’ll abide through rainstorm or light falling shower,
So when I am tempted to give into fear, I stand confident in His grace,
He is my defense – He helps me make sense of the difficulties that I face,
I praise Him today for all that He gives to a wretch as hopeless as me,
Because of His love, which comes from above, sins were buried and I am set free.

THANK YOU, JESUS, FOR ANOTHER DAY!