The fears that are associated with this pandemic are far greater than the disease itself. We’ve taken all kinds of precautions. We’ve followed the rules and stayed home as much as possible. We haven’t attended church services (which I personally feel is an essential form of gathering.) We’ve closed down theatres, entertainment venues, schools, sporting events and much of what we spend time enjoying throughout our non-working time has been restricted. It’s enough to make any sane person a little whacko.
This past weekend was bittersweet. I didn’t follow the rules. My son came to visit on Saturday and I hugged him – a few times. Yesterday, we were invited to our youngest daughter’s for a wonderful meal and I hugged all of them. I couldn’t hug my oldest, because she lives in S. Carolina with her family. I couldn’t my oldest grandson, because he’s teaching in South Korea – but I wished I could have hugged all of them too.
I must admit I felt pretty sorry for myself at the beginning of the weekend, because it was a Mother’s Day like none other. However, everything lately is not like any other and we’ve been forced to accept it as such. I know that it’s not going to last forever, but still there are so many changes that it’s bound to play on us emotionally.
Last week I went shopping without a mask. Even a bandana makes it difficult for me to breathe. I didn’t wear gloves, because I didn’t have any latex gloves and couldn’t find any in the store. Besides, the rebel in me wanted to prove something, I guess.
As summer approaches, weddings and graduations have been cancelled. No playing is allowed on park playgrounds. It’s enough to drive us over the edge.
I’ve been coughing my head off this past week and have totally avoided doing any yard work. I love digging in the dirt and seeing new growth, but I don’t want my allergies to send my breathing issues up through the roof. I wonder if I have COVID19, but know it’s simply the time of year and it will pass. Still I feel cheated of time I so enjoy, being outside with my garden tools.
We’re all feeling the effects of this pandemic in different ways. Each one of us has either experienced the disease ourselves or knows someone who has. Many have lost loved ones because of it. Even when you have a positive attitude, it’s difficult to work at home with so many distractions.
So what do we do to get over the hump of depression? I don’t really have any answers to that. I feel all of this is like going through the stages of grief. Yet some will not come out of it. Suicides will occur. Drug use will become more prevalent. Alcohol will be used to numb the feelings of loss. Eventually violence will rear its head – in fact it already has. When people are desperate they choose desperate ways of acting out.
I believe that God will use this ugliness to bring about order. He didn’t cause the disease. He isn’t paying us back for all the wrong things we’ve done. That was all initiated by the forces of evil. God cannot do evil and He never lies. His control of what happens is consistent. He rules the heavens and the earth. He formed all of it and it was good. We can count on Him to heal the land and all that is in it, if we just ask and trust that His will is going to be done for our good.