AN UNSENT LOVE LETTER

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Today we honor the veterans who have served their country and have ultimately made sacrifices because of it. Wars will continue to wage on this earth, because there is a need to be number one – to accumulate wealth – to fight for a religious or political premise – to stand up for what we believe in – to show a love of country/patriotism. Wars are the end game in a climate of disagreement, bias, prejudice, principle or expectations.

Wars can bring out the best and the worst in us. The savagery, the blood, the loss of life and limb and the resulting PTSD which often follows a soldier home after battle, are all negative elements of war. What remains are stories of lost love, bread winners, parents, sons and daughters who were willing to give the most unconditional gift to his fellow man – love.

The following is a letter written by Union soldier, Maj. Sullivan Ballou, to his wife before his death on the battlefield. It was never sent, but found in the soldier’s belongings when his remains were returned to their burial site. His young wife of 24 never remarried. She was buried next to her husband at the age of 80. Sometimes the best reasons for war are stated in the pens of those who fight them.

July 14, 1861
Camp Clark, Washington

My very dear Sarah: The indications are very strong that we shall move in a few days — perhaps tomorrow. Lest I should not be able to write again, I feel impelled to write a few lines that may fall under your eye when I shall be no more …

I have no misgivings about, or lack of confidence in the cause in which I am engaged, and my courage does not halt or falter. I know how strongly American Civilization now leans on the triumph of the Government and how great a debt we owe to those who went before us through the blood and sufferings of the Revolution. And I am willing — perfectly willing — to lay down all my joys in this life, to help maintain this Government, and to pay that debt …

Sarah my love for you is deathless, it seems to bind me with mighty cables that nothing but Omnipotence could break; and yet my love of Country comes over me like a strong wind and bears me unresistibly on with all these chains to the battle field.

The memories of the blissful moments I have spent with you come creeping over me, and I feel most gratified to God and to you that I have enjoyed them for so long. And hard it is for me to give them up and burn to ashes the hopes of future years, when, God willing, we might still have lived and loved together, and seen our sons grown up to honorable manhood, around us. I have, I know, but few and small claims upon Divine Providence, but something whispers to me — perhaps it is the wafted prayer of my little Edgar, that I shall return to my loved ones unharmed. If I do not my dear Sarah, never forget how much I love you, and when my last breath escapes me on the battle field, it will whisper your name. Forgive my many faults and the many pains I have caused you. How thoughtless and foolish I have often times been! How gladly would I wash out with my tears every little spot upon your happiness …

But, O Sarah! If the dead can come back to this earth and flit unseen around those they loved, I shall always be near you; in the gladdest days and in the darkest nights … always, always, and if there be a soft breeze upon your cheek, it shall be my breath, as the cool air fans your throbbing temple, it shall be my spirit passing by. Sarah do not mourn me dead; think I am gone and wait for thee, for we shall meet again …

 “Our flag does not fly because the wind moves it… it flies with the last breath of each soldier who died protecting it.” – Unknown

About atimetoshare.me

As I reach the end of my years, I find I have a lot of good information stored up in this old decrepit mind of mine. If I don't write it all down, it may vanish and no one will have the advantage of my thoughts. This is why this blog exists. I love the Lord, Jesus with all my heart and soul. I know I'm undeserving of all He's done for me, but I also know that His love is beyond my comprehension. I've always wanted to write. I never kept diaries, but tucked my thoughts in my head for future reference. I use them now in creating stories, plays, poetry and my blog. I continue to learn every day. I believe the compilation of our time spent with God will have huge affect on the way we live. I know I'm a sinner and I need a Savior. I have One through Jesus, Christ. My book, "Stages - a memoir," is about the seven stages of life from the perspective of a woman. It addresses all the things girls and women go through in life as they travel it with Jesus, and it is available on Amazon.com.
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9 Responses to AN UNSENT LOVE LETTER

  1. So beautiful and so heartbreaking.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Heartbreaking words! This letter takes me back to Ken Burns documentary about the Civil War. He used numerous letters to the elements of human emotion into his film, just as this letter does now. Kathy, thank you for honoring our veterans in this special, reverent way.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. you know…my great-grandfather was killed in 1900 in the Spanish American war.
    He was 28 and his widow, my great grandmother was 24, left with four children under 4.
    Like the young widow in your post, she never remarried. And lived to be in her 80’s before her death.
    It seems that despite life being fleeting back in those days…in the day’s of low tech wars, disease, and a myriad of premature deaths…what was important…things such as family, faith, and marriage…were treasured and honored.

    Liked by 1 person

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