Yesterday, I posted a blank page. In a way it was how I was feeling – like an empty vessel with nothing left to give. Do you have days like that? Since I’ve had more time on my hands lately, the thought of aging, falling apart, feeling every ache and pain and thinking I’m going to die any minute. That’s why I’ve been writing this series on aging.
To be really honest with you, aging stinks. I know I’ve needed time to think things through – to ponder what the next steps may bring – to put this old body to use and still serve a purpose in the world. Some days are like that. You feel purposeless. Other times, your mind is overflowing with things you think you can do and then realize you aren’t capable of doing them anymore. It’s a dilemma.
So what do we do with such depressing news? For a while now, I’ve done nothing. Today, I’m changing that. I can’t simply sit at my desk, in front of a computer. The mundane chores of every day life are done and now it’s time to get off my duff and start living again. The alternative is to give up and give in to all the yucky thoughts that invade your brain when there’s too much time to think. Maybe that’s why I struggled so in giving up my vocation.
Throughout my life, I’ve been exposed to change. Change of schools, friends, work, family, address, etc. With each of those changes, came struggle, but also opportunities. We’re never too old to stop dreaming. We’re never too old to give up. There are still things undone that need doing. That’s what gives us purpose. That’s what makes us useful as human beings. God didn’t create us to be idle.
As I add to my bucket list of blessings, I thank God for His gracious hand in my life. I know He has a reason for my being here. I can move on with confidence that no matter what each day may bring, He will be there to lean on, to guide me, to protect and hold me tight.
“Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.” Psalm 23:6
This ends my series on aging. It’s a wrap and I’m glad it’s over.